Older Child — Page 2

10
Jun

And We Have a Winner!

June 10, 2011

The winner of my little contest from yesterday was Cydil!

I used Random.org to choose our first winner.

First?

Why yes!

Once I chose, I happened to be going through my photos and realized that Kristi was more correct in her guess than I had even realized! So she wins one too!

Here’s the first photo:

Notice Samuel pointing and Stephen behind him with the girls?

Here’s what happened just prior to that:

Turns out I had forgotten that Samuel wasn’t just chattering and being adorable.

Nope.

He was tattling.

And the pair of girls?

They were sent inside for baths.

But, yes, in answer to your many comments, we do go through an obnoxious amount of {pants}.

God Bless my sister-in-law, Carmen, who has been perusing Value Village in order to keep us well stocked.

Cydil and Kristi, I’ll be e-mailing you both for your addresses.

1 Comment

9
Jun

Let’s play a little game, and win a little prize!

Can anyone spot the one thing in this photo of Samuel, Stephen, Faith & Grace that prompted my post title?

I’ll hold a little draw for one of the “Picking Them Up With Both Hands” books that I blogged about in this post. Remember, the book whose proceeds will go towards helping the Rippee family complete their adoption?

It’s a great little book. I have one for myself, tucked one away for Samuel to show his kids one day and of course, the grandparents received one too.

So give a little guess and comment below!

12 Comments

8
Jun

Hear Our Prayer, O Lord

June 8, 2011

Tonight one of my children prayed a prayer no child should have to pray. Ever.

Dear Jesus,

Please be with my first Mom.

Please let her not be dead.

Please help her to know You.

And please be with all my Chinese people.

Help them to know You too.

In Jesus Name,

Amen.

Amen, my child. Amen.

2 Comments

7
Jun

A moment I don’t ever want to forget

June 7, 2011

{Psalm 31:22}

I had said in my alarm,

“I am cut off from Your sight.”

But You heard the voice of my pleas for mercy,

when I cried to You for help.

2 Comments

23
May

Facing Reality with a Capital “R”

May 23, 2011

That’s me.

Facing Reality.

We received a surprise recently which has us off to Portland, Oregon tomorrow.

When we returned from our visit to Children’s Hospital last month, we were so thrilled with what God had done in putting all the pieces together for Samuel. I mean, we were over the moon, couldn’t stop talking about it, absolutely in awe. I mean, we still are. And then, to top it off, I received a letter in the mail.

Months and months ago (like, in the early days of our paper chase for Samuel’s adoption), a fellow Mom of a New Day alumni contacted me. Her daughter had undergone surgery and been fitted with a prosthetic through Shriner’s hospital and she had great news for us. Low and behold, she had arranged for her daughter’s Shriner’s prosthetist (Brock) to see Samuel in Beijing when Brock was there on a medical service trip. New Day had arranged for Samuel to be brought to Brock and as a result of this fellow New Day Mom connecting us, I was able to speak with Brock over the phone and even receive the X-rays that he had taken of Samuel when he examined him in China. What a treat!

Well, that got us thinking. We decided to pursue an application for Samuel to be treated by Shriner’s once home. Forms were filled out. I developed a phone relationship with the provincial rep. And then we waited. I heard rumors that cut backs had made it harder to receive acceptance into treatment for Canadians and I was hopeful, but I kind of let it go.

So, here we were less than a week home from our mountaintop high and I received the letter we had been hoping for. Samuel was accepted into treatment. I keep equating it to winning a lottery, but essentially it will allow for his treatment and prosthetics to be covered for his entire childhood. In addition, we can even ride their “Care Cruiser” bus to appointments (many hours each way) and receive accommodations and food vouchers for our time away. I literally bawled when I heard. Like many families in the adoption world, our kids (& in our case, both adopted and bio) have needed a wide variety of therapies and tutors and extras to help them grow and learn and heal and blossom. And each of those come with a price tag. For once it felt so good to be told again and again in response to my tentative questioning, “No, don’t worry about anything, it’s covered.”

So off we go. And I should be singing and dancing with glee.

Instead I have a lump in my throat and Reality has hit the past few days. I would be lying if I said otherwise.

We need to once again have the conversation. And the “A” word will be used.

Amputation.

And yes, to all of you thinking it, I did know it was coming.

I did do my research before we committed to bringing him home to be our forever son.

And we do want the best for him. We want to give him every chance at a full, healthy, active life.

Yes, we do.

But it still stings.

We see him as perfect and active and healthy and as living a pretty full life right now.

And every time someone else asks us what the next step is we tell them.

We talk surgeries and aids and prosthetics.

We smile and nod and talk about his bright future.

But underneath there is a part of me that wants to run to him and pick him up and race away as fast as I can.

Can’t you hear him giggle and can’t you hear him tease? Don’t you see him climb and and dance and chase his sisters until they run giggling too?

But I guess that is the difference of perspective. And of parenting.

Parents have to love a child as they are and yet do the thing that is hardest for their child in order to help them sprout wings and not just crawl, but fly.

I have to fight down that urge to pick up my kids and run away at different times with each of them. And this week it’s Samuel.

So I pack the suitcases. Call my sister-in-law to borrow the play pen. Make sure the many bits and pieces we need to load into the van are ready. And I pray.

Will you pray for us too?

(Photos taken Mother’s Day 2011.)

10 Comments

13
May

Picking Them Up with Both Hands

May 13, 2011

I just returned from a trip to the mailbox. I was so excited to find a copy of the brand new book, Picking Them Up with Both Hands, by author Caleb Phillips. Caleb was a volunteer worker at New Day during the early days of Samuel’s time there. He used his journals from the time around his days at New Day to compile a first hand account of some of the work that New Day does and even better yet, some personal experiences as a foreign worker in one of China’s foster homes. In one of the chapters he echoes what we were told about Samuel’s transition to New Day and as much as it makes my heart ache for my son I am so very thankful to have it all in writing to pass on to him one day.

The very best part about this wonderful book (besides the cover which features a sad looking little Samuel), is the fact that the proceeds from all sales will go towards helping the Rippee family fund their adoption (read about it here and here)!

Obviously I have a personal connection to this book, but I think it is a wonderful introduction to life inside a foreign foster home. If you’ve ever wondered just what it would be like to go and do, this book will offer you a glimpse from someone who actually went and did. Caleb has a simple blog set up where copies of his book may be purchased at: http://booksbenefitingorphans.blogspot.com/

Won’t you take a look?

Thank you Caleb!

You obviously have a big heart and we wish you well as you pursue a life focused on blessing the ones so many overlook.

6 Comments

28
Mar

More on sleep

March 28, 2011

Yes, that is my theme-song these days. 🙂

You see, I have the sweetest, funniest, most loving, mischievious three year old on the planet. But as I’ve mentioned before, he spends his days so intent on charming each and every person he encounters (even people in passing cars as we drive along!) that when he finally lays down, his sweet, sensitive, deep, old-soul self comes all but crashing down upon him and I think it is more than he can bear on his own. My job, then, is to find ways to help him take those times in the midst of his awake time to pause and snuggle and calm and be still. Brief times throughout his day just to be still. Then at nap and night time, I have to find ways for him to feel connected to me and yet maintain physical safety.

As life would have it, he dearly wants to be with his big brothers in the “boy’s room”. But he also wants his Mama. Stephen needs to travel regularly and so co-sleeping in our bed is out of the question. It’s just not safe for him to be there with me without another adult to make sure he doesn’t vault himself off of our bed in his sleep (as I mentioned, he moves all.the.time. in his sleep). And sleeping in a toddler sized car bed with a child who (by anatomy or desire, I haven’t totally figured out yet) sleeps with his legs bent at a 90 degree angle from the hip makes for a rather unpleasant sleeping experience for his bed mate. Especially when said child could easily outperform most gymnasts. ha

So, off we went and bought a crib to put in our room. I was thinking that if I had it smooshed up against the side of our bed he could be very close to Mama and yet be secure. Steve and James went upstairs and built it (Our friends call assembling a crib a “marriage tester” – Can I get a witness?). I bathed Samuel. Then I brought him into our room to show him and see if he’d be interested.

Ummm, yeah. Of course not. {slap forehead. again.}

He took one look at that thing and pointed. “‘Nigh, ‘nigh bei bei!” (He calls all baby beds / doll beds this.)

“Yes! Samuel’s chuang!” (bed)

“NO! Wo yao chee che chuang!” (I want car bed!)

And off he went around the corner into his room, muttering to himself, “Wo de chee che. Wo de chee che.” (My car.)

And he allowed himself to be tucked in, read to, sang to, snuggled (“Twinkle, Twinkle”), nose and tummy rubbed, prayed with (“Ready!” – more on that for another post) and off to sleep.

Yeah. We just spent $XXX on a crib as a sleep aid. And it was worth EVERY PENNY!

Tonight we had a repeat, with the exception of a few tears (three or four seconds after closing the door with he and Garnet in the room) and then I popped back in to reassure him after 3 or 4 minutes of quiet. After doing this 3 times, the fourth time he was no longer drowsy, but fast asleep.

Let’s recap (for my memory in later years) my children’s sleep histories.

James: Hardly slept through the night until age 14 months. We had routines and patterns we would follow – tunred ourselves in knots to help him and he would wake every hour to two hours.

Faith: slept wonderful. Almost went to be with Jesus at age 2 months from Whooping Cough. Then had to sleep upright for 2 months in recovery. Then was unable to sleep through the night until around 18 months. Sleeping is still a challenge for her at times. For her too, i think night time is when she does her best (or worst) thinking. We do our best to pray with her and work out her stress before bed, but sometimes it is what it is and she has ways to help herself rest (music, special things).

Garnet: He is our dream sleeper. The first evening we came home, put on his jammies, read a story, snuggled, sang, rocked and prayed and tucked him into his crib. He rocked himself (his head) to sleep and woke up 9 hours later cheerful and lively as usual. He had night terrors at a few momentous times in his first months (after EMDR therapy or after his English had improved enough to tell a bit about his time in China).

Grace: Struggled with her memories and fears at nighttime. It was heart wrenching. The plus side, her loved ones in China were up at that time of day and so we had late night phone calls suring those early months home. After six months home she was able to get to sleep around midnight and then sleep through until morning. Since our trip to China, she settles in quickly and easily and sleeps through. When morning comes she is generally cheery and ready to enjoy her day.

Samuel, well Samuel’s story is still being written.

I suppose the reason sleep has been such a focus for me this time is the fact that we are still so new to having four other children who sleep well. It was a long year for Grace and for me. I have consistanly been the one the kids want at night and so I guess I have been the most nervous about this area of adjustment.

All in all, we will weather this new phase. It all goes back to what we do in the day time to help the kids feel better at night. And when I hold to that truth, things always seem to go better.

3 Comments

5
Mar

Arrived in Zhongshan

March 5, 2011

Thanks for the prayers! More than I can say.

Faith is on the up swing, as is Grandma. Grace had a high temp and threw up just as the bellboys came for the luggage before our flight to Guangzhou. She’s amazing though and we carried on with a good dosing of Advil and Gravol. Garnet is having a tougher time since we landed. Even let Grandma snuggle him a bit (unheard of as he says he’s too old now). We’ll beat these bugs yet!

Beautiful, new boutique style hotel here in Zhongshan. Wonderful guide (Joanna). We had teeny rooms at first and shuffled around enough to get enough beds and all are alseep now.

We approached the city from a new angle (for Adrian & Roberta). More factories than we had seen (we knew they were there, right?). Loads of ads for LED factories. Porsches and RAV4’s. All shiny and new.

Cantonese now. Lots of smiles.

A crazy, speeding driver for our minibus tonight. We made it here in record time!

Saw 2 parents each on a scooter. Each carrying a small child in a Mai Tai wrap. One on Mom’s back and one on Dad’s front – legs sticking out and around Dad. Mom grinning as she raced after Dad’s scooter to beat the red light. Hair blowing. I will never forget,

Our Grace is doing amazingly well. She has crossed the line and now claimed us. The may sound strange, but it has taken until this week. And yes, that’s a long 15 1/2 months since her adoption. We still have a ways to go, but so many things have shown us a determination in her to claim us that we are actually starting to believe it may be real.

Faith is struggling. She’s tired. She’s asking many questions of her own. We are praying for her and trying to help her carry on until the end of our trip. It will do her heart good when we are in one place for longer than a few nights again and can actively build our new normal.

Samuel is doing really well. Loves his naps and yet will snooze in the carrier or our arms in we are on the go. Loves water. We hear “He shui!” all the time. 🙂 We are working on the please and thank you. He knows so much English.

Our Beijing guide (“V”) has a strong ND connection. Sponsored 3 kids there until their adoption. Visited frequently. We were delighted to hear of her heart and her spunk and excitement for ND! She recognized Samuel from the photos online. She told us that she initially found ND online herself after deciding to do something to make a difference (since her exposure to FOI adoption groups). Huge and amazing thing. We are thankful for her heart and will be praying she finds others to join her in carpooling out to ND as that is all that is preventing her from more visits! WOW! If you ever read this V – you are amazing!

Gifts are packed. Diaper bag packed. Camera packed.

Time for some sleep for Mom.

4 Comments

4
Mar

Challenging Day

March 4, 2011

We ended up travelling with all 9 of us to and from Yinchuan. Samuel works better with everyone at his disposal and it was great to have everyone there to support Garnet. Unfortunately, this morning, both girls woke up with bad colds. Grandma is still recovering from one she caught last week (all three were sharing a room this past week). Samuel refused food and slept through breakfast. After his impromtu nap, he rose to the challenge and downed 4 sausages though. We rearranged some of our plans and had a slower morning, a Hot Pot luncheon including an interview with a local journalist (“Surprise!” our guide sprung on us as we drove into the restaurant parking lot with sick and tired and rumpled kiddos – Oh well!) and a tour of the Wetsern Xia Tomb site and museum in the afternoon.

This evening, we arrived at the airport and attempted to check in only to find that some of our tickets had odd comments attached and so we almost missed out on our flight, but for the diligence of our facilitator and our guide. Yay! Then we cleared security (they let Samuel be carried through this time and thankfully didn’t confiscate our liquid cold medicine or “Grandma Soap”/hand sanitizer) only to find that our flight had been delayed two hours. Many odd gift shop food iems later, Samuel took a long crawling tour of the departures area and we finally made it onto the plane intact. Half the kids slept or dozed. The other half caught a meal on the flight.

After sending four of us in the first taxi at the Beijing airport and almost being charged highway robbery for a van-taxi, we found a regular cab driver who would take the remaining 5 of us in one cab (the cabs are only supposed to take 4 passengers).

Arriving at the hotel we found out that our gear was still in our rooms, but our key cards no longer worked. The front desk quickly made new ones up and after picking up some gifts left for us at the Concierge desk courtesy of our dear facilitator and friend, we made our way upstairs.

Soft snoring is calling to me from the other side of the room.

Off to Guangdong tomorrow afternoon.

Good Night!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Please pray for health and rest for our bunch.

We received some information that we hope to persue for Grace, just this evening. Pray that God would move clearly one way or the other on her behalf.

Pray for Jia Yi who I referenced in the other posts (Yinchuan). She is a very special little girl who very much deserves a forever family.

Pray for my brother and his family who are holding down many forts with us all gone. They are all very ill with strep and eye infections. Healing, rest and encouragement for all of them. Love you guys. Thank you for everything. It had meant so much to all of us.

Love,

2 Comments

3
Mar