While driving away from Fall sleepover camp:
Garnet: We carved pumpkins! We made one if ours stab the other one and the other one was throwing up!
Grace: we carved some too! It had a cross and on the other side had a beautiful flower….
Steve and I just about died laughing. LOL
This is my daughter. Fearless and Brave. She is her own person. She is strong of character. She knows what she likes. Seeks out what she wants. She finds it easier to be determined and harder to be tender. She is a force to be reckoned with.
{She’s a fair bit like her Mom.}
She’s growing up and we are seeing Time and Experiences mould her. More and more we are seeing the softer side of her peek out. Her love for Jesus gas been the catalyst. And what better mentor could there be?
We dearly love this girl. What a treat to be her Mom.
Waiting and waiting to be seen in pre-op with Garnet and James.
(Sorry – this was written last Friday, but never posted properly!)
Garnet will be having his bone graft done on his alveolar ridge cleft (hole in his gum line) on October 29th. He’s fairly pragmatic about it and rather excited about the smoothies and video games he is sure will await him after all is said and done. Trust me when I say that we are doing nothing to dampen his enthusiasm!
His surgeon had been considering putting in fixtures that would allow for an expander for his upper jaw at the same time. This is now up in the air as he waits to see more once in the process. We are relieved as it can be tricky at his age.
Back to waiting…. It’s a 2 hour appointment and it sounds like they are already an hour behind!
We were in Portland this week for another post-surgical visit for Samuel. We were told that he will be undergoing another surgery within the next 6 months to a year. This next one will help his gait a fair bit and will involve creating a better hip “cup” for his leg to sit in. The surgeon will basically carve out a better fit in his hip area and and reinforcing wires to help it to seat better. He currently has to swing that leg a fair bit in order to get forward motion. Hard to explain. We were expecting the surgery to be a possibility, but perhaps not so soon. We’ll head back to check on things in a few months and will find out more then.
Samuel also had an adjustment made to his boots! His Portland prosthetist has made them a much wider base. He was totally thrilled to get to standing on his own without a stick of furniture to hold onto. He tried a few steps with them and was pretty pleased. We then took them off to make the super long drive home. You see, they no longer fit in his pant legs and lets just say that Mana was glad that she’d bought Sam new undies as he got to show them off around the O&P lab and for the videos they take of him in the motion lab. Lol
I’ll get to altering his clothes tomorrow!
(The glow stick was courtesy of some members of the National Guard that were visiting. Samuel received a glow stick lanyard, a puzzle, mini football, art kit, Dino stickers and a monster truck toy all within 4 hours. The community, volunteers and staff really love spoiling the kids and teens that are in their care. Actually, I think they really just love the kids and teens. Period.)
This girl surprised me tonight. Actually she’s been surprising me a lot lately.
I had to leave for the evening and I left her elder siblings in charge of the herd. Birthday season is on a roll in our family and I needed to do a little shopping without the kids. When I got back and checked in on each of them, I was truly surprised to find a tear stained little girl waiting for me. She had convinced herself that I was taking a really long time. So long, in fact, that I must have been in a car accident or suffered some other terrible end. So long that she had gone through half a box of kleenex and made herself get the hiccoughs.
She poured out her heart to me. Told me all about how she had begged God to bring me home. Asked me (not for the first time) about what would happen to her if I went to Heaven first.
I am choked up just writing all this.
It’s tough stuff.
Stephen and I have always tried to tell our kids the truth (Okay, except for that one subject involving a jolly old elf in a red suit… but that’s another story for another time.). It’s something that we’ve taken a lot of flack for over the years from family and friends. But that’s just us. We aren’t very skilled at finessing a fine story when our kids ask us a pointed question. And early on it just became the most logical thing to tell them the truth when they have questioned us on things.
Why do I have to eat my veggies?
Why does that man use a white cane?
Why does the neighbour lady stumble funny when she comes home late at night?
Why did the policeman take away that man?
Where do babies come from?
Will you ever die?
Now there’s a show stopper.
Each of our kids has wondered this allowed during their preschool years. I don’t honestly know if this is age appropriate thought material or not. Perhaps we breed morbidly focused children? Regardless, when it has come out of their mouths, we have told the truth.
“Only Jesus knows, but here’s what the plan is no matter what and you can trust us to take care of you. You can trust Him.”
And off they would go. Sure it would come up again if a friend or aquaintance that we knew passed on, but honestly, it seemed to be enough.
For Grace? Not so much.
It seems as though a lifetime has passed for us with our girl.
I chose the photo for this post on purpose. I really love the camping dirt. The chubby toes. The relaxed grin. The lounging girl in the hammock. Such a picture of carefree innocence.
Such an antonym to the churning worry that lies beneath her surface.
I could go on about how trust takes time. How she’s been let down before by those who should’ve been able to protect her from the leaving abandonment. There I said it.
But what really hits home is the contrast.
She goes about her days happy as a clam. Flitting from fairy to pixie. And underneath lie the questions.
Am I safe?
Am I worthy?
Am I loved?
I don’t have the magic truth that will be the balm to her soul.
And so we dance the dance. Parry the questions. Again and again and again.
And maybe the best I have to offer is in my willingness to waltz when she asks. Meeting her toe to toe. Looking deep in her eyes. Letting her read my very soul.
Being a truth teller.
And again and again and again.
I love this girl.
She is my heart.
And she is so very, very worth it.
I stayed away for oh so long from my blog. Recharging? Regrouping? Hiding? Not sure exactly.
There was a time after we adopted Grace that we were online A LOT. Keeping connections alive. Those invisible life lines were so necessary. And it was draining on me.
Those days were followed by the whirlwind adoption of Samuel. More online obsessing.
And suddenly my life felt dry and tired. So much of the joy of interacting with friends online, jotting down family anecdotes and my heart that desired so much to do more for the orphan and widow, was just sucked dry.
I was dry.
I needed a fresh new start. And so did the blog.
As for me, I bought myself a new Bible. Rejigged our whole homeschool. Dejunked my home base. And decided to freshen up the blog. Make it more functional.
It’s not all there yet. The Bible, the homeschool, the minimizing of the house – they each deserve their own post. The blog is still under construction (my fault not my wonderful designer’s, who I’ll introduce very soon), but I felt the need to get on here tonight and get the ball rolling. I’ve got something left to give. And here I go!
The #1 question we get asked these days is:
Pretty good, if he says so himself!
(Oh no! She isn’t satisfied with only one quick pic!)
Samuel’s leg seems to be healing well. We fought to keep his incisions clean, closed and infection free.
With only a couple weeks left until his post-surgical follow up visit, we think he’s doing great!
(You’re too funny, Mom!)
He is still restricted in a few areas likfe weight bearing and bathing, but in true Samuel style he is managing to work around those.
(Maybe if I hide my grin she’ll put away the camera…)
And he keeps us in stitches throughout the day in spite of it all.
(I can’t control it. The giggles are winning!)
His favourite new thing is to ride around on his padded tummy scooter at breakneck speeds throughout the house.
(GAHHHHHHH! Mom!)
And now we are much less worried about him putting weight on his leg.
(That does it! I give up. I’m going to dive for cover and hope she can’t find me. giggle…giggle…giggle Oh drat! She heard me!)
Now we just need to keep his bicycle helmet firmly strapped on to protect his little noggin’!
I mean, I know we like to get a tad lively now and again.
Really and truly though, I feel this may be a bit much!
Okay. So maybe he was just cleaning out the gutters, but it made me laugh so hard when I came outside to put something in the shed and caught sight of him a way up there!
To all the Dads and those who love them,
